Is it possible to be platonic friends with a guy you’ve slept with?
I randomly hooked up with a guy about a year ago and have since then become friends with a lot of his friends. It was very casual, and I don’t think either of us are really interested in it happening again, but it somehow seems difficult to move on to being friends. I try to reach out and be friendly, but he doesn’t seem to be interested in reciprocating. Is it a lost cause?
In general, I would say yes, it’s totally possible to be platonic friends with a guy you’ve slept with. But, of course, it really depends on the guy.
I’d say there are two reasons why he could be acting weird:
1. He’s immature. Which is likely since he’s a twenty-something guy. He could be a great guy, with a great heart, good intentions, etc. etc. But my guess is he’s just a little immature and finds the situation awkward. He probably just doesn’t know how to respond and may even naively assume that you’re still interested in him. This is probably the most common reason why guys (and girls) act uncomfortable after a hook up, even as so much time has gone by.
2. He still has some lingering feelings or attraction. Maybe he’s not interested in it happening again, but he still feels some attraction there and that’s just making him awkward and uncomfortable. It’s totally normal to still be attracted to each other, even if you don’t necessarily want it to go anywhere. We’re still human and we can’t really control that.
Whatever the reason, I do think it’s still possible to get past the awkwardness....