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Ask Amanda: I Feel Guilty Moving Away from My Parents

posted on December 2, 2016 | by Amanda Holstein

Question:

Hey Amanda,

I love my parents and my boyfriend more than anyone else (I’m also an only child). I currently live at home (I’m 18) but I am moving in with my boyfriend late next year (my parents know about this). However I spend a lot of time with my boyfriend staying over at his place, and I only spend around 2 nights a weeks at home with my parents. This makes me feel incredibly guilty and I know they really miss me. However I’m a clingy girlfriend (my bf is clingy too) and I want to spend lots of time with him, but the guilt I’m feeling about not seeing my parents is really starting to bother me. Please help!

– Tracy

Answer:

Hi Tracy,

I totally understand what you’re feeling. At your age, you’re going to experience a transition from being intertwined with your parents’ lives to living your own life, independently. It’s totally okay for you to move out, live with your boyfriend, and start your life. They will of course miss you because they love you, but this is all a part of life. They have to handle this transition as well.

Just make sure you are communicating to each other — tell them how much you love them and what you’re thinking through this big life change. Chances are they totally support your decision and don’t want you to feel guilty at all. You clearly love them very much and because of that, they will always remain an important part of your life. You will always make them a priority, but you also need to make yourself and your life a priority.

They’ll be fine and so will you, I promise!

xo
Amanda

feature image via Logan Cole Photography