5 Places To Make Friends In Your Twenties (That Aren’t Awkward)
posted on March 20, 2018 | by Sam Brown
One of the biggest struggles I’ve had in my twenties is making friends.
And I know that might sound a little sad, but judging by the volume of emails I get from my readers telling me that they’re struggling with exactly the same thing, I know I’m not the only one!
Friendships in your twenties are TOUGH. With everyone moving cities, changing careers and living busy lives, it’s easy to feel like you’re alone. So in this blog post, I’m sharing 5 ways to make friends in your twenties – that aren’t awkward AF!
1. Get to know your friend’s friends
If you’re anything like me, when you meet your friend’s friends you normally don’t take too much interest. Sure, they seem nice, but you’re only going to hang out with them this one time so there’s no point getting to know them.
But getting to know your friend’s friends is actually one of the easiest ways to make new friends in your twenties. So take an interest and let your friend know that you’d like to do stuff with her group. And when you get invited, make sure you go! Yes, it might be a little uncomfortable at first but these are people that have already been vetted by your friend – so why not make the most of it?
If you’re passionate about feeding the homeless or finding homes for animals, volunteering could be the perfect way to make new friends. The key here is to make sure that you’re volunteering to help with a cause you’re actually passionate about – that way it will be easy to strike up conversation (and become friends) with your fellow volunteers. Bonus points if you take on an ongoing volunteering opportunity, as meeting people multiple times always makes things that bit easier.
3. Go to events
I know this one is SO obvious, but leaving your house increases your chances of making new friends. Who knew?! Start going to those events that your acquaintances invite you to and have a look online to see what events are being hosted in your city around different interests.
Since I have a business and I love talking about it, my favorite way to meet new people is by going to business conferences and events. But there are events being held every week for all different kinds of things! Check out meetup.com if you don’t know where to start and bonus points if you attend the event by yourself (don’t worry, most of the other people there will be going by themselves too).
4. Reach out on social media
OK, I know I just said that leaving your house increases your chances of making new friends, but reaching out to like-minded women online is actually a great way to kick-start a real life friendship.
A lot of my new friends have come from me reaching out to people on social media or from people reaching out to me. I know it might be different if you’re not a blogger, but if there’s anything you’re interested in then there are people you can reach out to!
Yes, it feels kinda weird. But remember, most women in their twenties are in the same situation as you and would LOVE to make a new friend.
Whenever I reach out, there’s a few things I like to do. The first is to make sure I never sound like a fan girl, because people want to be friends with their peers. And the second thing I do is give that person any easy out – I never presume they want to meet up with me or that they have the time. Not only does this let the other person know that I respect the fact that they’ve already got a lot of shit going on, but it also increases the chances that they’ll say yes because they don’t feel backed into a corner.
Here’s what I like to say:
‘Hi Sally! I saw that you’re posting about/doing [X] and thought I’d reach out to ask if you’d ever like to meet up for a coffee and share stories with someone who’s on a similar path. I know you’re busy and totally understand if you don’t have the time but just thought I’d get in touch to say I love what you stand for and to keep up the amazing work’.
5. Make time for the friends you already have
I know this one isn’t really about making new friends in your twenties, but I know I’m not the only one that gets so caught up in my own life that I don’t make time for the friends I already have!
If there’s someone you haven’t seen in a while, reach out to them, schedule a friendship date and make it happen!
Have you been struggling to make friends in your twenties? Let me know in the comments below.
And just so you know, I share more blog posts like this on my blog Smart Twenties.
I like the idea of going to events. As a social media world sometimes we forget the importance interacting in person.
After college I moved over 2,300 miles to a brand new city, not knowing a single person so I joined Meetup.com in hopes of meeting other women who shared similar interests. Over 4 years later, most of the friends I hang out with are the ones I met from these groups!
I also work at a coffee shop and have met some amazing people who were regulars. It started out as short small talk to getting to know them and eventually hanging out outside of work.
Really like this. Thank you for sharing! I just moved to Denver. Despite so many people being around I’ve had trouble making new friends because so much of the socializing revolves around the beer drinking culture, which I’m not a huge fan of. I love the volunteering idea as an alternative!
Meetup groups are a great way to meet new people because they’re organized around sharing interests. If you’re looking for something specific, like hiking or cooking, there will be groups devoted to that type of activity. You can also find meetups that have nothing to do with your interests at all — like book clubs or film clubs — and they still work well because they force you into small group settings where everyone is forced to talk about their favorite thing in order to make conversation flow naturally. Furthermore, start reading articles like https://samploon.com/free-essays/sociology/ to learn how to be social. There are times when you need to make friends in your twenties, and there are also times when you just want to hang out with your friends. It all depends on the situation and what you’re looking for at that time.
Here’s a beauty for you. My son 29 is a solo dad of a cute 12 year old living with the grandma & a cute 4 year old with dad, he has apraxia so doesn’t talk well but that’s a catch because he loves to talk & listen, just you don’t understand his babble, he understands yours. This adorable couple have been alone together for 2 years & it’s his dad speaking here now it’s so fkng sad but there’s nothing to get sad about if you want to meet this caring 29 year old new to Brisbane. We’re in a start up business that should be very successful, I just need to find him the right woman that deserves him & has the depth to understand a devoted male in the 2020’s. The problem is he’s not the shallow creep that seem to have placed there stake somewhere in society & if a woman shows a “genuine” worthwhile interest then you’ll have a rare keeper that won’t let you go & will laugh & cry with you at the times you need it. We’ve been through the cruel tribulations & it’s time for this man to relax & have fun again. Thing i love about him is he tries his best to make me happy & my mum happy so it’s what you could expect in 30years or even just have a great friend if you think you’re worth while. Probably find him at an oxley or similar park with a kid laughing & yelling out to him that doesn’t seem to make much sense. Thanks for listening he’d be mortified if he knew I spelt it out like that lol.