How To Know You’re Ready To Move In Together
posted on October 22, 2018 | by Jess Ciesla
I wish there was a cut and dry answer to this, but unfortunately there isn’t. It’s kind of a personal decision with many factors to take into consideration. For example, I had a friend who was with her boyfriend for 10 years before they got married and moved in together. Yes, 10 years! And I’m the complete opposite.
I’ve been with my now fiancé for 2 years. We first lived in an apartment together (before we were engaged) and then bought a house together (still not engaged). As you can see, it varies greatly depending on your situation. Although I can’t give you a black and white answer, I can give you some tips on how to decide if you’re ready for the next step.
You Don’t Feel Pressure
Moving in together, getting engaged, having a baby, etc., are all things that should be decided by you and your partner only. If you’re feeling pressure from friends or family that you need to move in together and start the next phase of your life, it’s probably not the best idea. Let’s face it; parents can be very pushy.
Once you feel at ease in your relationship, and you don’t let the opinions of those around you sway your decision, that’s when you’re ready.
You’ve Had Your First Fight
Sounds weird, I know. But let’s be real, every couple fights. The beginning of a relationship is usually all lollipops and gummy bears. Of course you’re going to feel like you can handle the next step in the relationship; you’re so happy! Until you have your first fight and realize that the person you love doesn’t have your back 24/7.
You need to be sure that this person respects you and can handle themselves when it comes to a disagreement. If you’ve survived your first real fight and did so in a mature and respectable way, moving in together might be the right decision!
You’ve Traveled Together
Traveling together is a great way to test your relationship. A lot of things can go wrong when you’re traveling. The first time Matt (my fiance) and I took a trip together, everything that could possibly go wrong, did. That’s actually when I realized we were going to get married. He handled every situation perfectly, and was so mature about it all.
I’ve been in relationships where it’s the complete opposite, and that’s no fun at all. I’m not saying your partner isn’t allowed to get stressed or upset, but if they take that stress and anger out on you in a negative and hurtful way, that’s a red flag!
Moving in with someone is a huge step in a relationship. It’s exciting and nerve wracking all at the same time! If you’ve got yourself a good guy and you’re genuinely happy in your relationship, I say go for it. Best of luck, friends!