5 Things I’m Struggling with Right Now
posted on September 13, 2017 | by Amanda Holstein
As much as I love giving advice, it’s not always easy to take that advice myself. So I thought today I’d get a little vulnerable and share with you some of the things I’m struggling with right now — things that I’ve given advice on in the past, but that definitely still come up for me. Hopefully, sharing this with you will help you feel like you’re not alone in what you’re going through! We all deal with internal stuff that isn’t always apparent on the outside, and that’s okay. It’s what makes us human! And here are some of mine:
1. Daily Anxiety
One thing I deal with regularly is anxiety. I’ve spoken about this before, but it’s definitely something that’s always present for me. I tend to wake up anxious. The day ahead always feels daunting right when I wake up in the morning. That anxiety does go away as I dive into my day, but it’s such a struggle to feel that every single morning. If I were to give someone else advice on what to do about this, I’d tell them to do something right when they wake up that makes them happy. That could be yoga, reading, taking a bath, drawing — anything really. But for some reason, I haven’t quite found that thing that makes me look forward to the mornings. It’s something I’m definitely still working on!
2. Not having a schedule
I think this one actually relates to my daily anxiety. To be honest, I hate having a set schedule. I don’t like being forced to do something at a certain time if I’m not in the mood. So I’ve gone the total opposite direction and thrown away any sort of schedule whatsoever. What I’m now realizing is that I do need some sort of structure so that I don’t feel overwhelmed first thing in the morning. I’m still figuring out what that looks like, but so far it entails planning my day the night before.
3. Working solo
The downside of working from home is that you experience very little social interaction throughout your day. As an introvert, I didn’t think this would be much of a problem for me. But it turns out, connecting with others gives me the energy I need to keep going. But when I’m alone all day, I find it difficult to push myself to get out there and be social. It’s a vicious cycle — the more I’m alone, the worse I feel, and the more I want to be alone. Recognizing this has definitely opened up my eyes and made me prioritize my social interactions. Whether that’s planning more coffee catch-ups with friends or attending more events, I’m definitely working on bringing more social interaction back into my life.
4. Finding passion in what I do
I’m not gonna lie — sometimes I don’t like what I do. Shocking right? I mean, I get to work for myself, be creative, and pretty much do what I want. But it’s still a job, and no job is perfect. I’ve been blogging now for 7 years (can you believe it?!), and it’s bound to lose its spark at some point. Currently, I’m trying to really look at what it is I like about blogging and what it is I don’t like, and hopefully bring back the things I like to the forefront. I also know that, for me, new projects are what excite me. So maybe I need to take things in a new direction or add a new project into the mix. More to come on that as I dig a little deeper!
5. Pressures of social media
Oh, Instagram. What a pain in the a$$ you can be. As much as I love you, I also hate you sometimes. A lot. Why? This is what I’ve been trying to figure out lately. As a blogger, I don’t have a boss telling me when I’ve done a good job or rewarding me with a raise to validate my hard work. Unfortunately, I’ve found myself looking to numbers to validate that for me, and those numbers happen to be on Instagram. It really sucks that all the work I do every day gets minimized to a dumb number on just one of the many platforms I work on. I know it makes no sense, and I hate that it affects me so much (and then I get down on myself about it, which only makes things worse!). What I need to remember is that 1) Instagram isn’t everything. It only represents one small part of my business and is not a reflection of all the work I put in every day. And 2) I cannot let the success of my business define my self-worth. I’ve talked about this before, but it’s definitely something that continues to come up for me.
Well, thanks for letting me vent, guys! I needed that.
And if you have any advice for me, man would I love to hear it!!
Carrie this fit chick Says
You are so not alone here! I struggle with anxiety too and you nailed the social media point too. Just keep breathing, staying grateful and making changes when you want to. Sometimes it helps when I remind myself that I am in control of my life and my feelings– then it doesn’t feel as scary all the time :)
Taylor Says
Thank you so much for your honesty. As a former freelancer, I can totally relate to the struggle of not having a structured schedule and the feelings of social isolation. It was tough to pull myself out of that rut, but making the choice to be social (I’m an introvert too) forced me to step outside of my comfort zone. It was good for me! I’ve found that keeping busy is the best thing for me.
Lindsey | This Miss Cooks Says
I’ve been struggling with some of the same things recently, and I can definitely relate even as someone who still works that 9-5. I’ve felt the daily anxiety creeping in this week, and for the life of me I can’t even figure out what sparked it. The best thing I can do for myself from my experience is to keep up with the routines that help my brain out (regular exercise, healthy food, etc) and know that no matter how it feels now, this too shall pass.
Sarah Koller Says
Hey Amanda!
I don’t usually comment on posts, but this one spoke to me. I recently took the plunge into freelancing, which, coming from a 9-5 office job, has been the biggest change! It’s so easy to get stuck inside all day and feel cut off from the world. I’m an introvert as well, but it became tiring after awhile to say the least.
What I found helpful was joining a coworking space. I live in SF, so I started using the app Croissant (like ClassPass for coworking spaces) to find something that fit for me. It has made all of the difference.
Anyways, just good to know there are other like-minded bloggers out there going through similar things as me.
Warmly,
Sarah
Amanda Holstein Says
Post authorHi Sarah! Thanks so much for this tip! I will definitely check out Croissant — sounds like such a great idea. Thank you!!
Girlady Says
I can relate to lot of your points. I’m still an employer, and I feel really stuck in this rigid schedule, the same old tasks, boss always demanding more, papers pilling on my desk…I constantly think about self employment, but not matter how much I try I just can’t figure out how my talents or hobbies or passions could be profitable. Guess it’s part of our nature, you know, never being a 100% satisfied with our current situation.
Kayla Says
Love this post and can totally relate on so much of what you’re dealing with, especially when it comes to Instagram. I feel like IG is KILLING me, but I also realize how ridiculous it is that I let an app define my worth and my mood.
Littleblackdomicile Says
Evening,
I enjoy your posts and we are miles apart in age. Today’s is very real and the points you are anxious about are the sign of success. Ive been in the design field for over 35 years. Solo until just a few years ago when I partnered with a 20 something. You girls have ideas that are fresh, exciting and have the same amounts of joy and fear. It’s all good. If you ever wake up and don’t feel like you do then it’s time to change. No matter what your industry, entrepreneurs are all the same yet few can master the balance like you have. I like be seeing strong women make decisions that are right for them!-Laurel
Ponnie Says
I so can relate to all these things! I’ve been experiencing anxiety for a few years but early this year was the roughest. I moved to the US and had to adapt by not working as my visa doesn’t allow me to. I felt very useless, not having goals or directions made it worse. It got so bad that it affected my health and wrecked havoc to my cycle. I fell down a few times while running and coming home crying for no reason. I even felt very nervous going to supermarket because I had to meet people. It’s tough.
I started trying meditation and going to daily gym classes, somehow it gives me motivation to improve my health and calms my mind. I can’t lie that most often than not anxiety creeps up randomly, but the breathing exercise I learn from the yoga class really help.
Perhaps, trying to set a simple daily goal will help our mind to focus on something else rather than dwelling on our anxiety. But most importantly, acknowledge your feeling and remember that it is normal to feel anxious. It is the first step to recovery :)
Cristina Says
Absolutely loved this post! I struggle with the majority of those as well and it’s definitely comforting to know there’s others out there with similar experiences.
Mia Says
That’s incredible that you’ve been blogging for seven years! I definitely think keeping the excitement and passion in blogging is so important. The pressures of social media suck…but I love the points you made about not letting social media and business success define you.
Mia | http://www.verymuchmia.com
Christina Says
This was awesome, not many bloggers take the time to be real with what is ACTUALLY going on in their lives. Have you tried meditation? There are quite a few free apps where you can do free 5 minute meditations the first thing when you wake up. I’ve found that doing them before I get sucked into social media is super helpful in putting me in the right mindset for the day.
Christina | http://www.thecaffeinista.com
Liz Says
I’m a new subscriber and I’m in awe of how fitting your blog topics are for me right now. It’s so comforting to know I’m not alone in not knowing my passion, not having any hobbies and being an overwhelmed twenty something. I’m so glad I found you! Please keep doing your thing and being honest. I love it!
samin Says
Hi Amanda. it’s the first time I comment on a post. well, to be honest, as an introvert and perfectionist, I can totally relate to most of what you’re struggling with, specially daily anxiety and having no schedule. maybe it sound funny, but I can’t even make plans for a day in my life, because it’s terrifying to me not to do all that I planed and some tasks remain undone on my list. anyway! I somehow figured out how to take over my anxiety and doing all I have to even without having schedule
whenever I feel anxious about something, I write it down on whatever I find nearby, on a paper or even on my phone’s memo. it really helped me to reduce my stress and anxiety.
as I said I don’t have a daily plan or schedule, but I write everything I should do on a paper. I look at the tasks and do whatever I FEEL I want to do. sometimes it changes in what is URGENT to do, but that’s OK ! I don’t push myself to do things in a limited time and I don’t feel bad about the undone things, so I’ll be less anxious.
sorry for my long comment! I hope I could help
Marta Says
Amanda, I never comment. To be honest, I never really leave a sign behind when I read your posts. Which is pretty shitty of me, I do realise that. But I’ve been following your blog for years. Countless years, honestly. I’ve only recently started following you on Insta but I never really scroll through there anyway, I just go straight to your website. So I needed to write this just to remind you how many shitty people like me are out there. I know my best friend’s one of them too. So there, you have two loyal followers, in Sweden and in Poland. And probably in so many other places in the world! Loyal followers who read your blog every day and are just shitty people and never show themselves. But even though we might be hiding, we still follow your every word. So remember, for every like on Insta, there’s probably 3 other people out there just waiting for the next thing you write.
So here’s my attempt to be less shitty and more of a valuable follower:
You got me hooked on Anthropology. Introduced me to boho chic. You advised me on depression even when it might not be visible on social media. You set up my fave playlists in the last few months. You are absolutely awesome, every single day, no matter what any number on any social media might say. Sometimes reading your posts I feel like if we didn’t live on the opposite sides of the globe we might’ve even become great friends. So keep being that, a good friend to people all around the globe. I’d say this business does define your worth- and it is frigging great. :)
Amanda Holstein Says
Post authorWhat a wonderful way to start my day. Thank you SO much for taking the time to write this, even though it’s not the most natural thing for you to comment. It means the world to me that you took the time to tell me this and that you’ve been following my blog for so long. Don’t feel bad about not commenting regularly! I totally get it. It’s just nice to know that you’re out there, listening and following along. Thank you thank you thank you more than you’ll ever know!! :)
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