Dating & Relationships

How To Healthily Communicate In A New Relationship

posted on January 23, 2019 | by Jess Ciesla

New relationships are so much fun! Whether you’ve met your partner at school, work, through a mutual friend or even at the grocery store (it could happen), those butterflies you feel in the beginning are just the best.

The “mushy gushy” stuff is great; however, it certainly doesn’t last forever and once you leave that stage it’s important to have a solid foundation for your relationship. If you want the relationship to go anywhere, you need to learn healthy ways to communicate with each other, and it’s best if you learn them early on.

So, here are a few of my best tips to help you and your partner communicate better.

Listen

It seems like the opposite of communicating, but it’s actually not! Being a good listener in a relationship is essential to good communication. I mean after all, if nobody listened we would all just be talking to ourselves, and that’s weird. Knowing that you are being heard is so important. It builds trust with your partner and opens the lines of communication.

So, next time your partner is telling you a story about work or complaining about his boss, let him know you’re listening. Simply saying, “I understand”, or smiling at him will show that you’re present in the conversation and willing to help in any way that you can.

Don’t Overthink Things

Let’s be real, we’ve all been guilty of this. At the beginning of a relationship, you’re texting each other constantly, sending cute emojis and pictures, and you think, “wow, I’m so lucky!” And then suddenly it changes. And not in a bad way, just in a different way. The texts are fewer and the emojis are sparser. And you think to yourself, “Oh my god, he doesn’t love me. Did I do something wrong? Is it my hair cut? I knew I shouldn’t have cut my hair. Maybe he doesn’t like my friends. Maybe he likes someone else now…..” And your mind completely takes over all forms of rational thinking.

The tendency to read between the lines or make untrue assumptions about your partner and the situation is a slippery, slippery slope. If the fact that he’s texting you less frequently or sending fewer emojis is really bothering you, have an honest conversation about it. Recognize that relationships go through many stages. And the fact that you’ve passed the “honeymoon” stage means that you’re heading into something more serious. And that’s great news!

Learn To Apologize

It’s not easy to be the one who admits defeat. But it’s important to learn how to take responsibility for your actions. Being the one to say, “I’m sorry”, shows that you care more about your partner and the relationship than you do about your ego. And that says a lot.

Now, this doesn’t mean you should take responsibility and apologize for anything and everything. It’s a two-way street. Your partner should own up to his/her mistakes the same way you should. I can tell you from experience that admitting when you are wrong is a healthy exercise in a relationship. It builds trust and brings you closer to one another.

Navigating the relationship game can be tough. It’s important to remember that no one is perfect, and as long as you’re giving it your best shot, you should be proud! Good luck, friends.